Say it right

Well, I didn't know anyone actually read this stupid thing until the party at Wendy's tonight when legions, hordes even, of people told me to make another post. Well, ok, that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but whatever. I felt like saying it.

Yeah, so I'm tired and should really go to bed now - actually, I'm in bed currently - I just hooked up my Dad's new high-speed wireless Internet, so I'm sitting here using my step-sister's laptop to do this. I'm also using it to listen to the latest Nelly Furtado single, of the same title as this post. I'm not sure why, but I've had that song in my head like crazy lately, and I don't even know when the last time I actually heard it was. As much as I find whatever songs I've heard off her new album annoying, I must say that "Say It Right" is definitely the exception. Catchy, and she doesn't sound too nasally. You know what another wicked song is that everyone reading this should check out - hmm, I can't remember what it's called but just go to www.myspace.com/brosmartin and listen. That album is going to be freaking AWESOME!!! It's Jason Martin of Starflyer 59 and Ronnie Martin of Joy Electric finally doing an album together. Oh baby.

Yeah, so I'm at my Dad's place in Saskatchewan for Christmas right now. It's good to be here. The first night I was here I felt really lonely and kind of out of place - I'm never fully prepared for that vacant feeling in the house due to the absence of my mom. The feeling soon passed, however, and I just feel at home on the praries again. If there were such thing as "belonging" somewhere, I think it'd be here for me. I just don't feel like I "belong" in Vancouver, which isn't to say I'm leaving anytime soon, but Saskatchewan feels like me, if that makes sense. I was telling Zach and Dana tonight how I envy them, owning the house that they do. I was thinking it'd be rad to move back here at some point, buy something similar (if not that very house), get a dog and an upright piano. Contrary to popular belief, I would NOT teach the dog to play the piano, because as everyone knows, that's just dang impossible! Instead, I would set up a music room of sorts (perhaps the living room) where I could mic up the piano and have a throw rug on the hardwood floor and sit a room mic on it. A little musical workshop, if you will. And I could go watch Fury games at the rink and hang out with my Dad between his rounds on the Zamboni.

Yeah, whatever. Who knows. Maybe I'd come back here and nothing would be how I expected it and I'd regret leaving Vancouver. Hard to say, enh? Oh well, everyone needs fantasies of some sort, right? It seems that in my life I've almost more often enjoyed the fantasizing and imagining more than I've actually enjoyed the fulfillment of said fantasy. It's like that poem by Keats, "Ode on a Grecian Urn": although the couple on the urn will never reach each other at least they'll never be disappointed because they're eternally reaching, prepared to receive, rather than actually receiving. What do you do once you get what you want? You end up wanting something else.

Those thoughts probably aren't as concise or articulate as I'd like them to be, but like I said, I'm freakin' tired! I think maybe I'll go have a smoke (I know Dana, girls don't like guys who smoke anymore (I love how you threw the "anymore" on the end of that - it used to be cool, right?), but who says I'm looking for girls? Oh yeah, the fact that Matt and I are going to the mall tomorrow to look for them. Whatever. It may be lame, but I think we're cool... kind of... ok, not really. Anyways, I'll go have a smoke, brush-a my teeth, listen to Nelly Furtado one more time and hit some bales.

Peace.