Strange Dream

As per the title, I had a weird dream last night that I thought I'd write down on here for whatever reason. Maybe you can analyze it for me.

In the dream I found myself at a big supper in what might have been some sort of hall or something. Attending the supper with me were pretty much all my relatives, as far as I know, on my Mom's side of the family. That's all fine and good except that in the last three years or so about half of that side of the family has died. And yup, the dead ones were there too, although in this case they were still alive.

The first person I came across was my cousin who died of meningitis when I was at college in 2001. I think I was with my brother when I saw him in the dream, so we both ran up to him, and I'm not sure if it was because I had assumed he was dead (which would seem logical), but I was just really really happy to see him. The weird thing was, though, that he wasn't alive like I had known him, but rather how he might have been had he survived the meningitis and come out of his coma (actually, I don't know what happens to people in those situations, but I guess my brain made this up). Apparently when he'd come out of the coma he'd suffered some sort of brain damage, so he wasn't able to walk or speak very well, maybe similar to when someone has a stroke. He was very uncoordinated and it was hard to understand him, but I just remember running up to him, overjoyed that he was there, and giving him this huge hug, and, I think, crying as I did so. I can't really even describe the joy and relief I felt at seeing him. It moves me even now just to think of it. I don't remember any specifics as to what was said, only this impression of such joy at seeing him.

I think my Grandpa was also there, although he didn't figure prominently in the dream. He was pretty much just in the background as I talked to these other people.

The other most striking encounter I had was in seeing my mom. She was pretty much normal, the way I remember her, but the vibe that I got in seeing her wasn't quite as joyous as that of seeing my cousin. The overriding feeling I got at seeing her was thinking, "Well, what does that mean for Dad and Carol? How can he be married to both?". The weird thing about that is that I've had several dreams now where I'll encounter my mom, like she's just shown up after being gone for a while, and the same problem persists: What's going to happen? How's Dad going to be with both of them? Sadly, in this dream, it was almost as though it was more of a nuisance that she was there and that we were faced with this problem.

Also, my Mom and I were talking in a room by ourselves after the dinner and she started telling me how I was obese. Yeah, I know, what the heck? That sparked a small argument between us as I looked down at myself and saw clearly that I was still the same size that I am right now, so by no means obese. I tried to point this out to her and she said something along the lines of, "Well, I saw you eating at supper and you ate WAY too much", to which I replied, very emphatically, as I remember, "Mom, it was a FEAST! We were celebrating! I don't eat like that all the time". I know that sounds almost comical, but the nature of the dream made it very serious and dramatic. I mean, dang, I thought my mom was dead and she's come back to lecture me about eating too much at a party? Which, by the way, she never would have done were she alive.

Yeah, that's pretty much it. It's just weird because that particular part with my mom has come up in several other dreams, where I'm just thinking, "Well now what?". I have had other dreams with Mom in them where I am really glad to see her. In the one that I remember most clearly I was standing in our kitchen in Dalmeny and she had just come home after getting groceries. I rushed up and hugged her so hard and started crying into her shoulder because she was just there all of a sudden. I think we even talked a bit about how she had died and she said something along the lines of, "Well, God decided to let me come back for a while".

Weird. I don't really think about this stuff very much, so maybe this is my subconscious doing it for me. If so, I'm not sure what that says about how I feel about my mom right now. I don't think I'll read too much into it. I loved her very, very much, and obviously would rather that she was still alive, but at the same time I'm happy for my Dad and want to see him happy with what he's doing. Maybe I feel like I'm betraying my Mom because of that? I don't know. I'm no psychologist.

It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighbourhood

As I stated in my last post, I've just moved to my own place downtown in Gastown. For those of you not familiar with Vancouver, Gastown is what could be considered a "heritage" section of the city. It's right by the waterfront of what I believe is the Burrard Inlet, and as I understand it's the only section of Vancouver that survived some big fire that burned up the rest of the city at the beginning of the century (don't quote me - my knowledge of the history here is vague). Anyways, the first little portion of it is pretty touristy as it still has cobblestone streets and quaint little shops, but it borders what is probably the worst part of Vancouver, being the East Hastings area. Knowing this, my place is right on the verge of the complete sketchiness of the Hastings area (I'm only one street down), but it's not so bad that I'm afraid of being attacked or anything. I'm pretty much right on the border of the nice area and the cracked-out area. This explains why I was able to find such reasonable rent.

Ok, so that having been said, I've already had a few interesting experiences down here, one of which happened only this morning, which has inspired me to chronicle them somewhat.

First of all, about a week or two ago I saw something that I wish I would have had a camera with me to document, as it pretty much summed up the area. I was walking back to my apartment with Ruth Ann after we'd been out to the (nude) beach and then dinner afterwards (for reference's sake it was a cold day and we didn't encounter any naked people (for shame!), nor were we naked ourselves - it's just a really nice beach). Anywho, I spotted something on the sidewalk and as I got closer I could see more clearly what it was. There was a very large and well formed pile of poo (which I'm assuming and hoping was from a dog) sitting on the sidewalk, the kicker being the big needle sticking out of it. Yeah, that about sums this place up alright.

I also happen to live above a bar which, sadly, hosts karaoke nights Wednesday and Thursday nights, so I get to listen to all the off-key drunks the floor below belting out crappy radio hits of yesteryear such as Alannah Myles' "Black Velvet". They also turn into some sort of hoochie-bar on Friday and Saturday nights, so they play dance music loud enough that the bass shakes the dishes in my sink until two in the morning. Suffice it to say, I don't get much sleep on weekends. So, with that having been said, the other night (a rare quiet one, for that matter), at about midnight, I believe, I was laying in bed reading with my window open when I heard from the floor above me, randomly, "Take that fucking video arcade music and die motherfucker!" (please excuse the language, I'm merely quoting). I could honestly not hear any music at all from where I was, but it must have been bad because a few minutes later I hear again, "Hey asshole in 313 - turn that fucking video arcade music off!". Then there was the sound of a door opening and closing, and for a period of about 15 minutes I could hear someone running up and down the stairwell, which my room is adjacent to (for reference, I'm on the second floor, so these guys were a floor above me). At any rate, it made me laugh. I also had the feeling that I probably would have liked whatever music the guy in 313 was playing, unless it turned out to be the Postal Service (which is also indicative of the nature of my building - I've seen several indie-rock scenester types here, as well as far less savoury characters).

Ok, and finally, the one that occurred only today, and which I consider to be the best so far:

Last night I was awakened around two in the morning by the sound of scuffling, chewing, and the ripping of paper. Upon inspection I found a mouse eating it's way into a garbage bag I had out that I hadn't yet gotten around to tossing. It ran under my fridge when I turned on my light, and there wasn't anything I could really do about it, so I just double bagged the garbage and stuck it in a drawer I took off the computer desk someone gave me when I moved in here. I'd been meaning to throw that out also, so this was all the incentive I needed to get rid of them both asap. This morning I took both the garbage bag, which was full of old magazines and quite heavy, and the drawer, also very heavy as it was made out of solid wood, into the alley beside my building. It was heavy enough that I had to carry it with both arms, so I gave it a big heave to toss it into the dumpster. As soon as I did I heard this loud yell as the drawer, with the garbage bag in it, came down hard on some homeless guy's head. I was immediately alarmed because I wasn't sure what was going to happen, if this bum was going to a)pass out and need medical attention, or b)freak out and come after me. There was some other semi-sketchy looking guy standing there when this happened and he looked into the dumpster and said, "That's what you get for dumpster diving". The homeless guy just rubbed his head whilst moaning. Then he stood up, faced me and smiled, revealing the fact that he had maybe four teeth in his mouth, and said, "It's my fault. If I'm not bleeding then I'm OK". After my initial alarm had passed, the scene replayed itself in my head and I must admit that I had a pretty good laugh as I walked to the Seabus. I mean, by no means would I have ever wanted to throw some big-ass drawer on some homeless guy's head, but dang, it was pretty comical. That thing was heavy! I just hope he's ok.

Yeah, and that's what it's like to live in my building. I think I'm going to invest in some mouse traps.

Well now, let's see...

Been a while, hasn't it? I don't seem to have as much time or desire to be on the internet as much lately. Kind of comes and goes in spurts. I'm here now, though, so I'll try to catch up as best I can.

1. Matt moved home at the end of March and I moved into my own place in Gastown, which is an area in downtown Vancouver. I'm pretty stoked to be living on my own, and I have to say that God totally hooked me up with my place. I'm paying really good rent for a place downtown, let alone my own place that has it's own bathroom (trust me, that actually is a big deal in this area). It makes things so much more convenient, and has cut my commute time in half, which is great. It's also really nice to live on my own (living with Matt was great too, don't get me wrong).

2. Just switched departments at the mountain where I work from Guest Services to Retail. I'm now a retail supervisor, which is cool in theory, but in reality so far I hate it. I only just started on Tuesday, so perhaps it's a bit too early to judge, but these have been some of the longest days of my working life (next to my time at McDonald's and HEL). Whereas the days used to breeze past, which probably had something to do with the fact that I basically just sat around and read a book or surfed the net, it's like I'm dragging a boulder everywhere I go in this new position . And this is no ordinary boulder, oh no! It's a time-slowing boulder. Ok, whatever, I just got off work and can't think straight, so feel free to ignore that. There are a few benefits, however, being a higher wage and a looser dress code. I'm now allowed to wear business-kazh, which is much nicer than wearing a dorky uniform everyday. I'm not sure that the pros outweigh the cons, though. I guess we'll see when I get my first cheque under this wage. Maybe things won't be as bad by then also.

3. Bella is going well. We're rocking it as a three piece now and I'm happy with the stuff we've been coming up with. Hopefully we'll have a record out by the fall. I'm excited to hear these new songs recorded. I'm also looking forward to playing some more shows.

That's about all I can muster right now. I think I'm going to pass out on my bed and try to ignore the terrible karaoke that the bar I live above hosts Thursday nights. Maybe my new Sherlock Holmes book will help me drown it out.

Until next time.